Plane To The Moon

Written By Bob

Matt and I always have a wonderful time hanging out together at night while Laurie is at work. There are times however, when communication issues get in the way. Matt might not know the exact word to describe what he wants and instead throw himself on the floor in a tantrum of frustration. Perhaps I will ask him to do something and he will immediately say “NO!” without even listening to me, even if what I just asked him to do was to eat a bag of M&M’s. Or, I will be too occupied with cleaning up the house or checking in on the sports scores to listen to him as attentively as I should.

One recent night when we got home from work/day care, I decided the theme for the night would be communication. That sounds about as exciting as some of the Effective Communication seminars I have taken at work. But I figured that if I listened to him better, and he listened to me better, we could eliminate some of the meltdowns that inevitably happen with a toddler.

I’d been having a problem with Matt refusing to come in from the car when we got home. This day, he lay on the bench in the basement that we sit on to take off our shoes and cried that he “wanted to stay” (stay at day care? in the car? I didn’t know). He received a two minute time out for not listening, and when it was over instead of just going back to our nightly routine, I made a point of explaining to him why he received the timeout, and that he needed to do what I asked of him. I think he got the point, because soon thereafter he picked up all the raisins he dropped under his chair at dinner without even being asked. Granted, it was so he could eat his beloved raisins but still… he was trying.

After dinner, I decided we would just chat. Matt is always talking when we’re home together but often times the busyness of life keeps me from listening as closely as I should. And since he’s a toddler and still mastering the art of speaking, it does require careful listening to completely understand him. I was curious what exactly was on the mind of this little chatterbox.

I asked him what he wanted Santa Claus to bring him under the tree and he replied “No, Grandma coming soon with presents for Matthew.” Even Matt had noticed that his grandmother has a habit of buying “Christmas presents” for him but then being unable to wait and giving them to him on Thanksgiving, or in October, or in July. We talked more about Christmas and to my surprise, he remembered that we had the tree in the living room the year before. He also asked if we could take a plane to the moon for Christmas. That might be one gift that Grandma can’t deliver!

When Matt later asked if I wanted to read books, I immediately dropped what I was doing in the kitchen to read with him. Normally, I’ll tell him to wait till later if I’m busy, but since he was being so good I wanted to reward him. We read all his favorite books and Matt even “read” one to me called Digger Man, the first book that he has memorized. I was so proud of him, and glad I sat down with him and listened.

As I tucked him into bed, he reminded me that we forgot to check for the moon, a ritual we have started so he knows it is time for bedtime. When “the moon is in the trees” (still coming up over the horizon), it is time to get pajamas on and play a bit more before bed, and once its up over the trees, its time for bed. “Dada, I check the moon again?” he asked me from his crib. “Awww, moon not in the trees!” he said disappointed, knowing that it meant it was time for bed, and that another fun night had come to an end!